What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

John lazzaro likes dick

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops