Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

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What do you call a dog without a bone? Floppy.

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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yo mamma's so fat you're fat too, because it's genetical

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

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2 men walk into a bar without thier shirts. They get kicked out. 2 women walk into a bar without thier shirts They got beaten almost to death Why? The men dressed up as women, and every hated them so much they beat the almost to death when 2 cops walk into that bar, see the men dressed up as women and they too beat them. Little do they all know that the men disguised as women are really secret goverment agents looking into a drug deal. The drug dealers got away and now we have 2 people sueing the police department and drugs on the street again. Oh yeah I almost forgot: I made this up so if you read it you're going to die withing the next 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years. I gurantee it. If you dont the men in white coats are going to do extremely painful tests on you and you just might die so then no one will care and maybe get onto thier lives again. Why did I right this? It hasnt happened to me so I dont know If you tell me I will give you something more valueble than gold. Want to know what it is? TELL ME FIRST!!!!

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what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

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Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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