A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

What long black and tasty? Licorice

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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