What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

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Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

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Yes

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Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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