what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

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What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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Dwarf Shortage

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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i'm an inbred jew - Barras

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

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How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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