A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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What's the difference between Justin Beiber and gay people? Quite a bit, actually, because Justin Beiber is one person, and "gay people" is a community.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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