How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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