What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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