- Anti Joke

two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

What's brown and sticky? Feces.

Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Triceratops

two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

What's upside down? umop apisdn

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?