what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you through them.

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

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Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he accidently dropped it.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

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Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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