What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops