What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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Whats the leading cause of death Life.

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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race-car = rac-ecar

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yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

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when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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What did the buisness man say to the hobo? Nothing, he threw an apple at him and laughed!

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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