So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

Shltskc gw? G

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

A Jew buys something that is not on sale

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...