Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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A Chinese man fails a math test

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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69.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops