whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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Suicide is never the answer. Unless you ask me what I contemplated after I found out that my family was killed in a horrific traffic accident.

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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