What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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What do you call a black priest? Father, and then whatever his name happens to be.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

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What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops