Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Are you black? Kill yourself.

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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"You're not very subtle, are you?" asked Nyacinth of the Prince. "Coo-fif," replied the Prince, a sly smile on his face.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

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What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Hi. He said it in sign language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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