What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

Death by kayak

why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

What's better than a stick? A stone

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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