In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

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God is real.

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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What do u call a man pointing a gun at you? A man with an anger issue

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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It's all Taggart

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

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A man serves his wife dinner. She laughes and tells him it tastes funny. He then procedes to tell her that is because he put large amounts of poision into the food.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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A russian, a jew, and a black guy are walking down the street. The midget trips and knocks into the jew who in turn knocks into the black guy. It turns out that they all know each other from high school. They ended up going out for lunch and drinks and it actually turned into a great day.

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

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What did Heinrich Himmler say to the chicken? I'll take that liver thanks.

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An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your child has been in a terrible car accident.

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A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops