A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

two scientists line up a frog at a line and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off one front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off the other front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off a rear leg and tell it to jump it jumps 2 feet they cut off its last leg and tell it to jump it doesn't move they tell it to jump again it doesn't move the scientists come to a conclusion: frogs with no legs...cant hear

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops