Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

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Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

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what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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why did the man fall? cuz he jumped from a building

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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