why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

Where did tommy go during the bomb? Everywhere. he was a cripple and couldnt make it to the bomb shelter.

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'Why the long face?' The horse replies 'I've got AIDS.'

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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