Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

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Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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Why is this website named Anti Joke because that's what the creator wanted it to be called

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What's brown a sticky? -A stick

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police your son died in a car wreck.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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What's the difference between a zebra and a newspaper? Everything.

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whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

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It gets very hot in Mianus, Connecticut

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Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

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Why do black people smell? So blind people can hate them too.

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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Why did the homosexual rapist walk into the pizza shop? Because he was hungry after a long day of raping little boys.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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