why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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what's inflation? a hollow cost.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

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Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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