Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

Penis

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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