Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

What did John name his dog? Doggy

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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