One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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What is better than a Beer? Two Beers.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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how many black people can you fit in a car? However many sets there are.

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Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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What is a mexican's favorite sport? Soccer, it is the national sport of mexico

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops