How do you make a man cry? you torture him

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

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how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Why was 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 was a terrorist

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A dead panda.

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- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

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whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

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Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

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Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

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A man is a joke for making a joke on antijoke

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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