What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

Knock Knock. Come in.

What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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