A man walked into a bar. He left in a body bag.

What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

why am i so sexy? I was raised by a dog.

Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

A man goes in to a town on Friday, stays there for 3 days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? He's lying,

why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

a mexican guy, a jewish guy, and a priest jump off a plane they landed safely and had a great day

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

why did you poop because you are a poop

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

I am a mime

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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