If life gives you lemonade.

Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

Drew Knowles is gay

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' That's fantastic because Peter Piper was paralyzed and the doctors said he would never be able tomove is arms or legs again, and there he is picking a peck of pickled peppers. I applaud you Peter Piper.

Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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