Why are asians such bad drivers? Cause they constantly have their eyes closed.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

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What do you call two black men flying an airplane? Pilots.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman went to the top of the Empire State building to have a penis measuring contest. The Irishman had the longest penis.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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Roses are red.........I slept with someone else

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Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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what is the difference between the number 2 and the number 5 3

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there once was a cat it was brown? fus-roh-dah

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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96

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What's greasier than a baby? A burger

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What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion? Answer- Take me to your weeder!

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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