"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

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Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

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Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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Faithful men.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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