Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

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What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

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Knock knock, Who's there Why did the chicken cross the road? Idiot.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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homosexual rights to marriage

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops