How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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All your facts check out, so I sent a little search team to find someone selling us out, it turns that they are after the leader of "The order" and "The king`s throne", so unless you got some small sub-department going on, point zero is in danger, ill explain everything once this is over.

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A black guy, a Jew and a Mexican walked into a bar...so I didn't....not because of their race but because I had already spent all of my money at the gay bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops