How do you call leprechaun with leprosy? Sick.

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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what did the ghost say to the bee boo-bee

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Jesus Christ

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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A man took a crap. . . . It felt amazing

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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Whats worse than the dole. The SRC!!!

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops