Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

Canadians

How to pick up chicks Pick up a chicken but must be a baby

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

What's black and chrispy inside? A black guy with bonecancer

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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