a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

What do I hate? people

What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

why did you poop because you are a poop

what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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