Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

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Why is the chicken afraid of the tiger? Chickens are inferrior to tigers and could easily be eaten.

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? You can't find a ferrari in my garage.

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y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

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What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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