A man walks into a boar. The tusked beast accepts his apology.

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Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

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Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

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So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

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Roses are red Heres something new Violets are violet not fucking blue

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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what did the orange say to the apple? hi

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This person shaved their head to gain attention. A klansman.

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How do you make a snake blink? You can't

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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Why wasn't the Asian at work? Because the sweat shop was closed on Sundays...

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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