Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Q. Why dont people like rian mcreesh ? A. Because he smells bad and gives off a creepy vibe ...

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

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Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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What's big, white, and kills you if it falls out of a tree. A Fridge

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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roses are grey violets are grey i am a dog woof woof

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

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What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

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What did the carrot say to the apple? Sandals

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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