What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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what do u say to a girl after you have sex with her? i like cheese

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Guess What??? Ur Murr

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What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

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a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

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what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

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An anti-joke

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

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An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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