What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

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What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

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There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

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Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

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What's funnier than 24? 9/11

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

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Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops