What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

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cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

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Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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