A bar walks into a man

Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

Caitlin Jenner has a mangina.

What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

Q: how do u wake lady gaga up? A: you poke-poke poke her face.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

What do you say when a black person is walking through wal-mart? Prisoner

Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

Whats worse than seeing your family killed in front of your eyes? Not much to be honest

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

lybia

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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