why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

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How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

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Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops