Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

A panda , a cheetah, a dog, a spider, and an eagle are in Antarctica.. The eagle looks around at the other baffled animals and says " What is this????? This isn't right! I'm so confused!"

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

How does a Black Guy eat chicken. Like anyother human-being.

A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

Why did the chicken commit suicide? Because the numerous failed attempts of crossing over the years deemed it almost impossible, therefore, chicken could no longer see the point in life.

chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

Q.What Did the Little Kid Say To Cancer In The Hospital? A.Nothing. He Died From Cancer 3 Minutes Ago.

a black person was walking into his home. good thing balls like apple juice and Miley Cyrus was keeping guard with her sword.

Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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