When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -17

when life gives you lemons, you should go to the hospital as you may have dyslexia

thumb_up thumb_down -17

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What does Jason say when he rages on cod ? I hope your family gets slaughtered in front of him ..

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops