Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

what did the orange say to the apple? hi

Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

What is cowboy say

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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