What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

Why can't february march Because april may

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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