How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be a .... The boy didn't finish his sentence because he got hit by a fridge.

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How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

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If you have a stroke, call 000

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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