what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

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HELLO EVERYONE

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

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What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

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Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

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What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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