How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

my egg roll

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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