Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

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Racial Equality

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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My jeans

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2 gay guys walk into the bar guy #1 say lets get drunk guy #2 says lets get wasted then #1 says... what do they do fall on the floor and do it.

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What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

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There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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Why can't you get a bull to talk? Because it felt like beating the shit out of you and mounting you.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A cow walks down the stairs. Not really. They are incapable of walking down stairs. It actually died on the roof.

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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