Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

Roses are red, pink, white or yellow. Stop stereotyping my arrogant fellow.

Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

Q What happened to the kid with diabetis and a one legged mom A. He got hit by a bus

How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

Paper or plastic? Yes...

What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad ill be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!!

justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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